Friday, August 20, 2010

Obligatory Weekend Release Post 8/20/2010

Wow, I chose a great weekend to come back! *sarcasm intended*

With a lineup like this I might as well have just moved into the Lava Tubes of Northern Cali/Oregon and become a hermit. I could have read fantasy books and fantasized about meeting a troll. Would have been a sight better than coming back to look at what's coming out this week.

Now, let's just get this over with.

Wide Releases:

Vampires Suck: If you pay $$$ to see this movie, and somehow manage to give it over a 2/10 (appropriately scaled) I may never read your blog again. I'm sorry, but if you encourage these two to make more movies, after all the abominable **** they've given us, I have no more sympathy. Only masochists may be exempt, because I'm far stretched to believe anyone could derive pleasure from any of their movies. Well, unless the TV tells them to anyways....

from Rotten Tomatoes: "Witlessly broad and utterly devoid of laughs, Vampires Suck represents a slight step forward for the Friedberg-Seltzer team." When witless and devoid of laughs are considered "steps forward" for you, I think you should take the hint, and bugger off.

The Switch: Wait wait wait, let me get this straight. You're telling me thespian, and let's be honest acting genius, Jennifer Aniston is doing a romantic comedy! I DON'T BELIEVE IT! Oh, and it's one that seems to be randomly similar to just about every other one!? NO WAY! Man, and here I thought she'd be on the Oscar track in no time. Just for the record: Jeff Goldblum and Juliette Lewis are given passes for being awesome anyways. Patrick Wilson - jury out. Jason Bateman - still indifferent.

Nanny Mcphee Returns: The cast may just get me to check this out in DVD. I was generally indifferent to the original, but the likes of Maggie Gyllenhall, Rhys Ifans, Maggie Smith, and of course Emma Thompson peaks my interest. Then again, it's doubtful this will be any better than the last, but solid RT reviews has me hopeful.

Piranha 3d: Another maybe DVD, if for no other reason than my desire to laugh at horrible carnage, homages to old school horror. Granted the commercials for this have made me put my head in a hole and imitate ostriches (yes I know they don't really do it, but shush).

Lottery Ticket: I know I'm not the target audience for this, but wow this look dreadful. I know there's a strong need for comedy less aimed at the middle class white audience, but can they be made without exploiting every racial stereotype in the book? I would think the people behind these films, aspiring black writers and directors (exception to Tyler Perry whom we all know is not aspiring anymore, and doesn't care) would care more to reflect less negative stereotypes. Oh well.....

Limited Releases:

Nothing that really stands out to me, but here's a list of some of the releases -

Hiding Divya
Mao's Last Dancer
A Film Unfinished
Soul Kitchen (2 theaters)
The Tillman Story

Best of luck with whatever you choose. Odds are I'll be spending the weekend helping my sister move into her new college apartment. If possible I might venture out to see Scott Pilgrim. Well, to all yeh marry readers, enjoy yourselves (if at all possible)!

12 better thoughts:

The Mad Hatter said...

Easily a dvd weekend, if not one for everyone who sat out Pilgrim last week to give it a look.

I'll be seeing RUBBER tonight, and THE DISAPPEARANCE OF ALICE CREED tomorrow.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I second your thoughts on Vampires Suck. And I will check out Piranha 3D on NetFlix.

Rick "The Hat" Bman said...

yeah, the only one of these that looks remotely interesting is Piranha 3D... and it really only looks interesting for the sheer cheesiness of it. I'm probably going to see it in the theater if only to experience the added cheesiness of the 3D. One of the few times you will actually see me purposely choose to see a movie in 3D.

Will said...

In lieu of seeing any of these, I'm gonna try and wrestle myself outside and finally see Inception.

Robert said...

Go see Scott Pilgrim, it is certain to be a more entertaining experience than all of these movies combined. Haha!

SugaryCynic said...

Scott Pilgrim, round 2!

Castor said...

The sad thing is that a Jennifer Aniston movie looks like the best option this weekend. Dreadful week of release and I think the overall quality is going downhill from this point on until early November... (Not that we had a great year so far...)

The Mad Hatter said...

At the risk of sounding like a broken record - this sounds like a perfect weekend to chase down a smaller summer movie that might have been missed. Stuff like WINTER'S BONE, GET LOW, RESTREPO, etc.

Univarn said...

@Mad I would, but I've missed my chance to see Winter's Bone (couldn't get the time) and I don't think Get Low/Restrepo have made it here yet.

@Alex Netflix sounds like a good option for P3D

@Rick I dunno, I think it looks pretty mediocre, even as cheese goes, but perhaps you're right.

@Will I recommend taking a deep breath, and setting your expectations to normal beforehand. People have a tendency to go psycho over movies, especially in their labeling (and analysis).

@Robert I don't doubt that one bit.

@Sugary FIGHT!

@Castor I'd probably see Piranha 3D or Nanny McPhee before I dared venture into The Switch.

Rick "The Hat" Bman said...

@Univarn - I could be wrong but demmit I am really hoping it is a really cheesy throwback to the original movie. Plus Alexandre Aja is directing it so that counts for something.

I am just looking for something that is on par with Snakes on a Plane. One of those movies that knows how to have fun with the fact that it is just really bad. The kind of movie you go see with just a bunch of friends and you just have a good time making fun of it.

Also, as of now it has an 83% on Rotten Tomatoes.

Andrew: Encore Entertainment said...

Nanny McPhee is pretty great I think. Better than the original and really a lot of fun, I hope you Americans like it.

Simon said...

Did you see the fake comments in the commercials of Vampires Suck, the ones from 'Ivana Tinkle' and the like? I literally wanted to throw my TV out the window. I get mad over this kind of shit, okay?

(I have nothing else...)

Nanny McPhee and Lottery Ticket look...fine.

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