Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Obligatory DVD Release Post 2/15/2011

Here we go, it's the week to end all weeks. This week I'm going to do it. This week I'm going to lick two stamps in a row without getting dry tongue. A bit ambitious? Well, I always like to live life on the edge.

New Releases:

Unstoppable: Oh Denzel Washington's half-cocked eyebrow, how I love thee. Why couldn't I have asked out that eyebrow for Valentine's Day. Crap. I always think of these things too late. Between that eyebrow and Rosario Dawson's flailing 'Chrysler' building hands, I had a real opportunity for a romantic evening in. But no, I did what I always do. Sit around and watch TV shows while randomly deciding whether or not I'm going to invade Yugoslavia.

Waiting For Superman: Superman? What about this film? My god, did they want me to watch it? I've been waiting patiently. First, it 'conveniently' shows up in NC while I'm too busy to watch then sneaks off into never never land before finally landing on DVD the same week as national Uni drools over Denzel Washington's eyebrow day!? How do they expect me to watch this! There's no room in my busy scheduling of eagerly counting the seconds between Washington's eyebrow + chuckle + "my man" triple whammy. I could die if I had to stay away! On the plus side, I'm sure this is a fine documentary and fully worth my time and investment....

You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger: Dear People who constantly complain that the Oscars aren't trying to arbitrarily pick the film we'll be caring about in 10 years, I give you your Oscar winner. Why? Because it's the only likely one to win if that were the method by which they decided things. First they'd realize that the future is unpredictable and nobody knows what films, if any, we'll care about in ten years. Then their only move would be to turn to Psychics, who we all know are 99.9% scam artists, each beginning with the prose "you will meet a tall dark stranger." This will inevitably lead to every film being called You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger every year until all of the film society collapses unto itself and the only thing that remains is Michael Bay and hundreds of tall people standing in shadowy street corners. And it'll be all your fault.

Other Releases: William S. Burroughs: A Man Within (anyone want a pizza?), White Lion (looks like Aslan, not Aslan.. fail), Glorious 39 (add 30 and we've got a movie), and Game of Death (hey look it's prisoner A4201920!)

Other Goodies:

Blu-Rays: Chaplin (RDJ was a great Chaplin)
Rain Man (who's on first?)
The Stranger (Orson Welles overacting FTW!)
Network (Howard Beale is my savior)
Last Tango in Paris (if only I could dance)
All the President's Men (Robert Redford's hair + Washington's eyebrow... oh god, I won't survive)
Close Encounters of the Third Kind (HIT THAT BEAT!)

This is the end of the post. It is now time for you to leave a comment. If you don't leave a comment, I will cry. My tears will be on your hands. Cheer?

5 better thoughts:

The Mad Hatter said...

I'd have to go with CLOSE ENCOUNTERS on blu ray there Vanna.

Castor said...

This week's DVD release isn't bad if you haven't seen those movies but I have already seen Unstoppable and it's worth watching only once. I sort of want to see Waiting for Superman but no... not really. Education is obviously useless for a large portion of the population anyways.

Aiden R. said...

Please don't cry.

rtm said...

Wow, so many movies I haven't seen... what a terrible movie blogger I am :( I probably will see Unstoppable eventually, though the last Denzel movie I saw also got trains in it.

Univarn said...

@Mad I concur. Do you concur? Sorry, having a Leonardo flashback.

@Castor I'm eh on Woody Allen, and meh meh on Unstoppable. Will see, but no rush.

@Aiden I'll do my best.

@rtm You're not terrible, in fairness there's a lot of terrible movies out there. Got to find the balance I suppose.

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