Friday, January 14, 2011

Obligatory Weekend Movie Post 1/14/2010


WIDE RELEASES:

The Green Hornet: Hahahaha, Seth Rogan as a superhero. Man, that one never gets old. We all know real superheroes are chauvinistic males with inferiority complex and ab muscles! We can't have a slightly obese male going head to head with the criminal underworld alongside a super Asian guy, it won't fit into our preconceived notions. Still, we all know the greatest Pudgy white guy - fighting Asian combo team of all time is Inspector Clouseau and Cato (this is old school Peter Sellers for those unaware...).

The Dilemma: I find it to be a perfectly pleasing (and partially ironic) fact that the movie about dealing with a particularly difficult dilemma has had more than its fair share of dilemmas to deal with. How do they deal with dilemmas? Apologize, delete, and send out a wave of celebrity faces to try and cover it up. However, we all know the real tragedy of this film... Jennifer Connelly. What is she doing!? She's gone from Requiem for a Dream -> Pollock -> A Beautiful Mind to The Day The Earth Stood Still -> He's Just Not That Into You -> The Dilemma! Please, someone in Hollywood, SAVE HER! I know not all of you like her, but she's one of my favorites and I hate seeing her (along with Juliette Lewis) being relegated to third string friend/someone's wife.

Limited Releases:

Barney's Version: I always knew Giamatti had something special in him. I didn't know it was a desire to play a giant purple dinosaur who likes being around young children all day. Wait... just one moment... sorry, I'm being told this is an entirely different Barney. Shame, I was kind of looking forward to the other one.

Ong Bak 3: Coming to an island near you... if you live in Hawaii. Oh, it'll also be in NYC. It's a shame, really. Ong Bak is one of those series I keep going, "eh, it'll get good soon!" and now it's ending. Oh well.

A Somewhat Gentle Man: Exactly what we need now, a gentle gangster. "I'm going to rip off your pants, take this prodding iron, and shove it... right into the hay stack next to you. Then I'll give you a little bit of a tickle before slapping you twice, TWICE!!!!!!"


Other Notes: Black Swan, Blue Valentine, Rabbit Hole, and The King's Speech are all receiving massive expansions this week. Keep an eye on your local theaters for a chance to check them out!

6 better thoughts:

Lesya Khyzhnyak said...

I want to see The Green Hornet because of Cristoph Waltz. ANd god, I love fun action movies. Will see it next weekend, I guess.

PS Again, you and Hatter published your posts the same minute. There's something eerie in this.

The Mad Hatter said...

I'm off to Green Hornet as well, at the very least to see what Michel Gondry can do with the story.

@ Lesya... I'd bet that like me, Univarn writes his post the night before and sets it to post in the morning. Under the heading of "great minds think alike", we probably both choose 8am EST for our posts to go live.

Lesya Khyzhnyak said...

@Mad, oh now I see. Thanks for explanation!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I'll probably skip Green Hornet, although I did watch the Green Hornet Mysthbusters special last night. They proved you really can drive half a car - if it has a second fuel tank up front.

Castor said...

The Green Hornet is probably about as good a movie as we are going to get for the next 3 months... Can you tell it's January?

Simon said...

I love how Hollywood takes a generally Asian guy--in this case, Taiwanese Jay Chou--and make them either Chinese of Japanese, because come on, who can tell the diffence, amiright?

I, as an amateur afficianado of Asian cinema, take offense.

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