Friday, July 23, 2010

The Losers (2010)

THE LOSERS
DIRECTED BY: SYLVIAN WHITE
WRITTEN BY: PETER BERG & JAMES VANDERBILT
COMICS BY: ANDY DIGGLE
OVERALL SCORE: 5.00/10


Assumed dead after their last mission was meant to take them out, a group of elite special ops team up with a mysterious rogue assassin (Zoe Saldana) to find out who is behind their sudden betrayal.

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I honestly can't tell you the name of any of the characters in the movie. I honestly can't tell you any of the plot points except that at some point Indians appear and make a bomb, and the Zoe Saldana gets steamy with Jeffrey Dean Morgan (don't blame me, blame slow motion). Beyond that The Losers is basically the equivalent to a drug trip. You know you took part, and you vaguely know it was enjoyable, but damned if you can remember any part of it except for the odd flashing image (.... or so I'm told *cough*).

For, you see, The Losers saving grace is most ironically its own great weakness. No real character, or plot, development, The Losers guides its viewer from action scene to action scene; with a comical over the top ambivalence that reminds me of the latest Italian Job remake... without any of the creativity (or equally talented performers). Siphoning out any element of entertainment it can grab, The Losers doesn't avoid pitfalls. Instead it quickly lines them up and proceeds to run into every one of them with the most carefree of attitudes.

And, if it were not for a hilariously over the top (intentionally or not) performance for Jason Patric, I would find it hard to give it a 5 at all. Sure, it's mediocre, but it's so in a way that manages to frustrate, as much as it does entertain. Every "cool" move couldn't be more predictable even if the viewer had the script right in front of them. Yet, it finds a way to make its unoriginality an appreciable plus, but only in a "wow, that's marked down so low" bargain bin kind of way.

Do I recommend checking it out? Not really. Do I recommend not checking it out? Not really. The Losers is the perfect movie that's not recommendable, or recommendable. A near impossible to review movie, for the simple fact that it inspires no opinion either way. Perhaps a cheap bargain bin pickup would be ideal placing.

The Losers is unoriginality to the highest degree. It escapes boredom by being comically over the top, quick, and charming. While it escapes care by being plotless, characterless, and unoriginal. Not the kind of movie you're likely to remember, then again if you get the 90 minutes of entertainment out, it might be all for the best.


7 better thoughts:

TheAnswerMVP2001 said...

It's got Zoe Saldana shooting a rocket launcher, that's all that matters to me. I'll check this out when Netflix gets around releasing it to the public.

flixchatter said...

Thanks for the laugh Univarn, this movie doesn't seem to even deserve your well-written review! "Yet, it finds a way to make its unoriginality an appreciable plus, but only in a "wow, that's marked down so low" bargain bin kind of way." Ha! Seems like the $4.99 bargain bin is the perfect placement indeed! It should perhaps come with a label: For [Jeffrey Dean Morgan] or [Zoe Saldana] or [insert name here] die hard fans only.

Univarn said...

@Answer Perhaps. I find it hard to recommend it based on what is basically a 10 second scene. But that's definitely one of the (few) highlights.

@flixchatter Your welcome. I'd say it's more of a movie for those who don't really care, and have about 90 minutes to kill.

Mike Lippert said...

I liked this movie. I agree, nothing original, but action movies have become so bad this one actually has some redeeming qualities, maybe most noteworthy is Jason Patric as the villan. It was certainly better than The A-Team.

TheAnswerMVP2001 said...

@Univarn - Saldana in an over-the-top action film in general has my interest. If you had liked this film I'd actually be worried, but since you didn't I know I'll probably enjoy it.

Kaiderman said...

You know, Univarn, that is actually a great review. The Losers wasn't bad, it was just so BLAH! An A-Team knock-off fo sho but had the potential to still be an interesting and fun movie. Plus, I LOVE Jeffrey Dean Morgan and Chris Evans.... such a shame!

Castor said...

Probably will check it out someday a few weeks or months from now when it somehow manages to get to the top of my netflix queue. No hurry obviously :)

"The Losers is the perfect movie that's not recommendable, or recommendable." That's exactly what I think of so many movies this year, Predators for example would be one of those that leave you empty with nothing to talk about.

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