I'm not entirely sure why I number these. Let's be honest, you all don't care anyways. All you want to know is how many dumb remarks I can make about this weekend's releases right? Well, let's get to it!
The A-Team: They're back! Not from outer space. But most definitely with a sad look upon their face. We should have changed those locks. Thrown away the keys. For god's sake, why are they back to bother us? Hey, if they can take liberties with the cheesiness of an old show, why can't I do it with an old song? Besides, this movie will likely be entertaining, and nobody will remember it in 5 years. Welcome to TV to Film adaptations!
The Karate Kid: Who knew when you took 26 years to remake a movie you added on about 26 minutes to the runtime? Well that's not exactly true, but this 2010 remake is apparently clocking in at a shocking 2 hours and 20 minutes. My god, that's 1/5th a Sex and the City movie! I kid I kid. Let's be fair. It's gotten mediocre reviews. It's probably a mediocre movie. And if it can survive its runtime, it might just be able to sustain a lot of negative backlash. Mediocre. Defining the year 2010 so exactly.
Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work: The downside to movies with : in their title - it makes my format look incredibly stupid. *cries*. Then again, in comparison to all the facial surgery Joan Rivers has had over the years, it might just look like a masterpiece. I'm sure this will be funny. Insightful? I doubt it. Then again, when has anyone ever listened to Joan Rivers for insight? Well, disregarding fashion, which I don't think counts much anyways.
Winter's Bone: Early RT reviews are heavy thumbs up for this indie film. I haven't heard much about it, but it's most definitely peaked my interest. I'm gonna keep an eye on this one, and see how the buzz pans out.
Chanel Coco & Igor Stravinsky: Well that's a rather self explanatory title. But, really, how many Coco Chanel movies can you have in over a years time? I'm still waiting to see the Audrey Tautou one! How can I possibly go see Anna Mouglalis first! Mads Mikkelsen aside, one must have their preferences!
Univarn Recommendation: Tread lightly to the theater, maybe a rainy day outing. If possible, go indy.
That's all folks!
Eggsy Returns In The First Trailer For ‘Kingsman: The Golden Circle’ - [image: Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017) Taron Egerton][image: Eggsy Returns In The First Trailer For ‘Kingsman: The Golden Circle’] No one could’ve gues...