Since my little trial with this last week went well (quickly becoming the most viewed article of any I've written - *tear*) I figured it deserves a full time spot on the blog. So what can you expect? Well that same witty (maybe) series of jabs and cheap shots you've come to expect. Here we go!New Releases:
Up: When I was told Pixar was releasing a film about an elderly man and a young boy scout in the forest alone I was shocked, I had no idea Pixar was working on a sequel to Doubt! I kid I kid. Why? Because I care. Really this is a fine film, you can read my review here.
The Ugly Truth: As a note to all the ladies out there, just in case these films confuse you, this movie's bull****. Not all superficial guys are secretly kind hearted souls seeking love... they're just superficial. If you don't believe me, go marry one, and I'll see you in about 10 years when your looks start to fade. Oh, if you want to read my review you can find it: here (that's it Ryan really pull in their desire to want to read more... fail).
The Accidental Husband: A film purchased only by The Accidental Viewer. Despite sporting a rather oooooo worthy cast the movie holds a 5.4 on IMDB. If you're not sure what that means, GI Joe sports a 5.9 and Transformers 2 a 6.2. That's right, people rate this movie lower than both of those. It's safe to say you'd have to drag me to see this.
Spread: When I first saw Ashton Kutcher in front of the camera I thought "get out of the way you're blocking my view of Mila Kunis," my second thought was "why are you on tv anyways?" After countless awful films he's yet to qualify that in my eyes, and as such I'll only watch a film of his if I have to. Besides, who wants to see him having sex with lots of women in a comedy anyways? Oh that's right, desperate ladies.
Ink: Sadly this is not a period piece about the development of the pen, I'm still holding out though!!! Really it's a Sci-Fi film that despite having not heard one thing about this film up until last week I've been hearing non-stop praise for this indie film that's just finally getting a release. Given all the praise I'll definitely be giving it a rental.
Other Releases: Ballast, Pray the Devil Back to Hell, Woman in Berlin, Must Read After My Death, Enlighten Up!
Blu-Ray Goodies
Heat: Sure there's a certain amount of sex appeal to Al Pacino and Robert De Niro... wait what!? Ohhhh you meant a different kind of Heat. Right, yeah a bank robber flick. Oh I kid, it's much better than that, definitely a Michael Mann highlight real of dialogue and storytelling.
Logan's Run: Michael York you may be the star of this film but my eyes were stuck on Jenny Agutter, what the heck happened to her anyways? Pure entertainment, are there a few plot holes? Maybe, are they really worth caring about? Nah. Sit back and enjoy!
Near Dark: Really? Is there anything more pathetic than the cover art for this? You can see it here, and I can safely say this: Someone has spent way too much time watching Twilight posters.
The Negotiator: I'M SAMUEL L. JACKSON MOTHER ******! Ok, so he doesn't say that in this movie (or any movie for that matter) but a man can dream can't he? Really I'm not sure this movie is worth the extra money for Blu-Ray capable thriller if you want to watch it, it's a good rental.
Well that just about wraps it up for today! Just remember, if you hate yourself, the only way to fix that is find someone else, and just hate them more. Ryan, that's horrible advise! Quiet you!!!
Umm, I did it again didn't I? Ugh, I need to learn to stop typing out all my thoughts... Hehe :).
5 better thoughts:
Up is my favorite movie from this year. I'm definitely gonna get it.
The Near Dark cover art is criminal, and completely misrepresents a (great) film. I'm looking forward to see Ink though, it sounds freaking awesome.
Hey! I just found your blog... very cool. I have a pop culture/movie blog too. I really need to rent UP. I have heard great things about it but somehow missed it when it was in theaters.
@Movie It's definitely another great one from the Pixar clan. I'm ashamed to say I own 0 Pixar films though :x.
@Shannon I still need to see Near Dark but yeah that cover art made me gag a little. Ink does sound great, I fear the hype will overbear though.
@Sarah Welcome! Glad to have you aboard. Here I was thinking I was the last person in the blogosphere to have not seen Up, *whew* thanks :P.
Up is a great movie with a delightful story but it is not for kids. It is not and should not be regarded as another one for the children. In my opinion, just like "Watchmen" is not a comic (similar to Wall-e), "Up" is a genre's step towards maturation.
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