As I sit here at my grandparents house, on "borrowed" WiFi (which moves at the speed of a turtle facing imminent nothingness) I find myself glad about two things:
1) I'll be able to be there for my grandparents' 80th birthday party (as both will turn it this year)
2) There's nothing coming out I feel any real loss for not having been able to seen.
Scott Pilgrim vs. The World: Take that Woody Harrelson! You thought "the people" were hard? Cera has to take on the whole damn world! Oscars, I think you know what needs to be done. Oh, and you still need to apologize to Edward Norton for the 3 Oscars he should have won in the 90's but didn't. Just saying. This is the only release I have any real interest in. Yet for each commercial that sold me for it, one sold me against it. I want to see it, but I'll leave how quickly I do in the praise of my fellow bloggers (please avoid "greatest movie ever" or I will kill you).
The Expendables: The Quest for the Holy HGH! First introduced via the great wizard, followed by Stallone killing a rabbit, and lastly them following the yellow brick road to steroid land. Where they slay the dragon, rescue the princess from her slumber, and become heroes (or heroin addicts, whatever). All of course before they are arrested by the cops! HUZZAH! All is now well with the world.
Eat Pray Love: Pay Watch Movie. Cry Drink Mope. Go Out Bums. Do Something Else. Try Live Life. No Vicarious BS. OK, I may have cheated a bit on the last one. At the same time I don't want to harp on the life of the lady who wrote the book. What she did was quite amazing, and comes with good life lessons. My problem is people who read the book (or in this case watch the movie) and do nothing but complain about why they never have a life like that. Because you're worthless! You don't need a catalyst to do something with your life, you just need to do it! As for the movie, this looks meh. All of the moments, none of the heart.
Animal Kingdom: All I need to know about this is Guy Pearce + Mustache. You might as well just call it cinematic Christmas.
Tales from Earthsea: Son of Hayao Miyazaki finally gets his 2006 film a US release (limited). Not sure how this one will play out (talk about unfair expectations), but I think it looks like a good starting point. Sooner or later people will remember not all Miyazaki films are masterpieces either.
Okie dokie folskies. Have a good one, and enjoy your weekend viewing!
Eggsy Returns In The First Trailer For ‘Kingsman: The Golden Circle’ - [image: Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017) Taron Egerton][image: Eggsy Returns In The First Trailer For ‘Kingsman: The Golden Circle’] No one could’ve gues...