Friday, October 9, 2009

Obligatory Movie Weekend Post #4

Ah yes, it's friday. The most lovely day of the week. Admit it, if you're going to school you're only going there physically. If you're going to work you'll probably be barely there mentally. Because you know, like all of us, it's MOVIE DAY! Now, after last weekends amazing series of rave reviewed releases, Hollywood has decided not to release anything of merit, in fear that it might actually scare people into wanting to go to the movies (despite their being nothing to do as fall closes).

S0, my tangents aside, it's time for that post you love to not read the most, your OBLIGATORY MOVIE WEEKEND POST for 10/09/2009!

If you're new to these welcome, and if you're a long time journal reader... well, I'm sorry. Moving on!

Couples Retreat - Producer: "Hmm Four Christmases and The Break Up made a lot of money... what do they have in common?"
Intern: "Ummm they're both generic romance movies that offer nothing new, and hide under the false pretenses of new names?"
Producer: "Yes, but there's something more to it than that, something larger!"
Intern: "Both made a lot of money despite nobody remembering seeing them?"
Producer: "I'VE GOT IT! They both starred Vince Vaughn + Jon Favreau!!!"
Intern: "Wait, that's it?"
Producer: "I CAN SEE IT NOW! We need to put these guys in everything! Quick get Favreau and Vaughn to write something."
Intern: "I think Favreau's in between doing Iron Man 2... and Vaughn, well he just worked on G-Force so I'm sure he's free."
Producer: "MUHAHAHAHAHAHA I can see it now... all the money shall be ours."
*Some Time Later*
Intern: "Well we have their script in."
Producer: "Well come now boy, how is it? Will it make us lots of money!?"
Intern: "I don't know... 4 interns died of boredom trying to read it."
Producer: "alright alright well it needs some spicing up... let's get that arrested development guy, and throw in a fat guy!"
Intern: "yeah, but this movie takes place on an island resort... not the most appealing crowd for such a film."
Producer: "Meh, throw in some hot 20 and 30 year olds, and tough girl talk. I can smell it now, a hit is in the air!!!!"
Intern: "God save us all...."
Producer: "What was that?"
Intern: "Ummm, nothing."

Why did I bother going on so long with that? Well, because there's nothing else opening in wide release, and my imagination got the better of me. Moving on to some other films getting the limited release tag:

Good Hair - A yes, I love how Chris Rock can take the entire history of African Americans and boil it down to hairstyles... exactly what racist white america needs.

An Education - Despite my belief that it will be a great film, from the commercials and publicity spots I've seen, I must put the "beware of superior intellectual yuppie-eque dialogue" tag on it. Though I'm sure it's not that bad.

St. Trinian's - Gemma Arterton + Talulah Riley = thousands of happy male teenagers (and one *cough* 22 year old *cough cough*).

Trucker - Michelle Monaghan getting oscar buzz from Roger Ebert? Nathan Fillion in a noteworthy role? Count me in (when it comes closer to cheapo theater/dvd time that is).

Free Style -
The only thing I find more perplexing than the people who made this movie, is the people who will go and see it. An obscure family film nobody wants to see not going straight to DVD? Someone must be trying to sneak a god awful film in when nobody's looking! WELL I SAY NAY! Bloggers... ATTACK!

Hey, your not attacking. Where are you going? Don't leave! Please! Stop *cries* I'm so lonely. Ah crap... I did it again.

We done.

2 better thoughts:

Andrew: Encore Entertainment said...

Hey. I love superior intellectual yuppie-eque dialogue. I always think that beneath his racial jokes Chris Rock really hates white people.

TheAnswerMVP2001 said...

Nothing for me this weekend. I've seen Zombieland twice and that's more times than I usually see the same film in the theater and more times than I usually go to the theater in a month! I might go see the Michael Jackson concert film, but other than that I'm probably good until December when Sherlock Holmes comes out.

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