Saturday, August 8, 2009

Crying with Joy for Expendables

Do you hear that sound in the distance? No it's not another war in the middle east... it's in fact the making of the most awesome horrible action flick ever!!!!

In case you haven't heard the Sly himself is coming back baby! And this time he's got some real reinforcement!!! Oh I could almost cry with joy. Let me just lay down the cast on you.

Sly Stallone
Jason Statham
Jet Li
Dolph Lundgren
Eric Roberts
Randy Couture
Steve Austin
Terry Crews
Mickey Rourke

with Rumored minor roles for Bruce Willis and the Terminator himself Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Did you just wet yourself? No!? How could you not!!!??? With that cast, written and directed by the stone himself, this movie has the potential to redefine what it means to be an awesomely awful movie! Not since Predator has so much testosterone and bad acting been thrown into one amazing film! If this movie isn't over the top insane action and stupidity I will file a complaint against Hollywood.

I know what you're saying though, ohhh but there's so many people involved I'm sure it won't be worth it.... Really!?

Set Decoration: Robert Gould... the man behind such classics as Commando, Total Recall, Cliffhanger, and Cobra!

Production Design: Franco-Giacomo Carbone... the man behind Rambo, Starship Troopers 2 (the most awful movie ever), and Cabin Fever!

Music By: Brian Tyler... the man behind Eagle Eye, Dragonball Evolution, Fast & Furious, and War.

Cinematography: Jeffrey Kimball... the legend behind those films you love like Star Trek: Nemesis, Paycheck, Windtalkers, MI2, and True Romance!

Costumes by: Lizz Wolf... the woman behind those classicly awful films Knights and Nemesis (not to mention Rambo!!!).

Editing By:
Ken Blackwell... whose style well stood out in those films Friday the 13th (reboot) and The Butcher!
Paul Harb... whose never really done anything before.

OH Stallone how I love thee, please make this movie everything it has the potential to be. 30 years from now when I'm sitting in a rocking chair I want to be able to tell my kids I was there to see The Expendables... and when they ask me what the hell that is I want the honor of saying "The Most Amazingly Bad Over the Top Great Action Film Ever!"

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